Stages of Senior Care: Your Step-by-Step Guide to Making the Best Decisions

My mother lives 1,000 miles away in a senior independent living facility where she is happy. However, her health has started to decline and although I have medical power of attorney, I am asked to make decisions for her only if she's unable to make them herself. I don't want to be caught off guard in an emergency and so this book has been very thorough for being aware of services, resources, and the differences in living arrangements. She has a great relationship with her brother and sister-in-law, scores of friends, and ties to her community dating back to 1956. She has lived in the same zip code since 1976. Stages of Senior Care: Your Step-by-Step Guide to Making the Best DecisionsLast year I had asked a pastor who had served as chaplain for an assisted living facility if she could recommend a good book like this. Now, after sharing my copy of this book with her, she has purchased one for the church library and given two copies to members of the church to help them.My mom is in the hospital now, but I have located excellent (next step) facilities near my home and also near hers, depending on how she recovers, and what She Needs and She Wants next. It has given me peace of mind to know that my research has been thorough, all because of this book!

Let me start by saying that, in full disclosure, I have the privilege of working with Paul and Lori's company by providing marketing services (including the marketing of this book). Whereas it might not normally be appropriate (or credible) for me to post a review of a client's book, my personal experience has moved me to a point that I would feel guilty if I didn't share.On December 3, 2009, I attended one of Paul's book signings in Fairfax, Virginia. The night before the event I stayed up late rereading the book in preparation for what was to be a large event with several hundred caregivers from the Washington, DC area. The event itself was a typical book signing with Paul doing a great job of personally reaching out to as many of the attendees as time would allow.Over the course of a couple hours, my job was to video tape as many testimonials as I could from the various caregivers, social workers and other health and aging-related professionals. By the end of the day, I was overwhelmed by the stories of sacrifice (which I consistently hear from caregivers) and how sorely a resource like Stages of Senior Care is needed.On my drive home I began to feel guilty that I had never shared Stages, or any of Home Instead's caregiver resources, with my own family. You see, my wife's grandparents are 94-years old and had moved home from Florida about three years ago to be closer to family. They were in relative good health when they moved back and made the choice to stay independent by moving into a senior apartment complex.Over the past couple of years, their health has deteriorated in what seem to be pits and falls (literally). With each of these instances, I watched them grow increasingly dependent on my wife's parents for their care. All the same, my in-laws aren't the type to complain, so we kids (I'm 40) rarely considered the awesome responsibility that had taken over a good part of their lives.Last week, knowing that my grandfather's health was starting to take a turn for the worse, I ordered a copy of Stages to be sent to my in-laws' house the following Saturday. I have to tell you that I was nervous. I have done very little to help in the care of my grandparents, yet I was sending my in-laws what is essentially a "how to" book on taking care of their parents. I thought about this over the weekend, hoping they wouldn't be offended or think that my gift was an indication that I felt they weren't doing a good job.Monday morning, on my drive to work, I received a call from my mother-in-law. She sounded different. My normally upbeat mother-in-law was obviously shaken. She started by telling me that my grandfather's cancer had metastasized. This was a tough moment. It was that first instance where you realize the end is near for someone you really love. As I was trying to hold it together for my mom, she went on to thank me for sending the book. I'll never forget the tone of her voice; it went from sounding like she was on the verge of tears to a deep and inner peace. She explained that the book had arrived Saturday morning just after they received news of my grandfather's health and that it was time to bring in hospice. She explained how she opened the book and went straight to the chapter on hospice. She said she read the chapter a couple of times and, even though she had been through this before, it answered many of her questions and prepared her for their initial meeting with hospice later that day.Finally, she told me how happy she was that she had gotten to spend so much time with her in-laws over the past three years, and how their love for each other and their faith in God has brought her peace. Ironically, I don't think she had gotten to read the afterward of Stages yet but, for anyone considering reading this book, I recommend starting at the back. Paul and Lori's dedication to changing the face of aging is rooted in their faith which they share as the cornerstone recommendation for any family caregiver.I hope you buy this book. Paul and Lori don't make a dime off the sale of Stages, all of the proceeds go to their non-profit foundation. More importantly, I want you to know that it's not insulting to share this book with a someone who is blessed with the awesome responsibility of caring for others. It might be the most loving thing you can do.

This may sound odd, but having this book is a bit like having a friend sit down with you that's already been through it all. Sadly, many of us will be faced with caring for aging loved ones whose ability to care for themselves slowly slips away. The decisions are agonizing, and nothing you can do will make them easier. This book is written simply, without fancy jargon, and addresses the realities that are ahead. It offers ways to ease the transitions. Most importantly, it offers strategies for easing the burden on the caregivers who ultimately bare the most weight of having an aging loved one.

This is a must have book. It is very, very comprehensive. You can skip around to the parts you need answers for right now. It has great questions to ask for in house help, or for the resident management. It has real life, right now, applicable resource addresses and information. I bought this for myself and my two siblings. We went over it with my parents a few years ago which helped last year for us to make a lot of progress. This is a no nonsense book that is like a bible in the help, comfort and resources it offers.

General knowledge. Somewhat dated...novice material. Hoping for more specifics and examples from experiences. The chapter on the end of life was the most informative.

There is a bewildering selection of "how to care for the elderly" books. Paul and Lori Hogan, in Stages of Senior Care, wrote one which is worth finding. They teach their readers about critical potential resources for the challenges: professional, non-familial service providers, for example through home health agencies which can provide in-home nursing assistance, or a skilled nursing facility. The Hogans founded Home Instead Senior Care, a chain of franchises which offer in-home assistance ranging from simple companionship to hospice support. The book is admirably balanced - while the Hogans do use their professional experiences with Home Instead for reference, they readily draw on other data and opinions as well.The book is a detail-by-detail look at all the possibilities, and when they are most appropriately in use. But equally important, the Hogans, with compassion and tact, alert their audience to unanticipated obstacles. Among them: safely managing a parent who develops paranoia as a symptom of Alzheimer's; your own intense, often conflicting emotions about your family; the terrifying financial drain resources can cause. This book gives people some tools for coping.Lauren Williams, Certified Professional Organizer(R), Owner, Casual Uncluttering LLC, Woodinville, WA USA